Monthly Archives: February 2013

The Adventures of Touring with a Rock Band – Part 7

Two fun drinking games I learned while touring, that I encourage all of you to take part in.

First, the Buffalo.  Apparently, this stems from the gun-slinging days, which makes it truly badass.  When drinking alcohol, one must drink using only one’s non-dominate hand.  The reason, is so that your dominate hand, the one that you would use to retrieve your pistol with, is always free, in case you need to suddenly draw.

Notice how her left hand is the one she will be drinking with.

Notice which hand is being used for what.

Most people are right-handed, thus, you MUST always drink using your left hand.  If you are drinking from your right, and someone calls “Buffalo,” you have to chug the rest of your drink.  However, if someone calls Buffalo, but they are incorrect (for example if the drinker is left-handed, and the “caller” is unaware of this), then that person must chug their drink AND buy the next round.  The only way you are exempt from all Buffalo rules, is if you have a tattoo of a Buffalo.  The person I learned this game from, did in fact, have a tattoo of a buffalo on his wrist.  I kind of fell in love with him when I discovered this.  So he can drink from whatever hand he wants, and never needs to chug or buy drinks.

Though this is known as a “game,” it is more of a club.  It’s a lifelong commitment, that unites loyal, honorable drinkers.  I’m sure this is why it is popular amongst the “touring” crowd.  Every person I have met who is a member, has also been on a tour at least once.  A real Buffalo member will never dispute or whine about having to chug a drink if he or she is in violation.  Also, Buffalo members will never be “that guy” or “that girl” at the bar.  It’s for serious drinkers only.

BuffaloClub

One must be invited by a member to become one.  So, if you are not part of the Buffalo Club, you are not allowed to start playing now.  However, now that I have made you aware of its existence, if you hear someone calling “Buffalo,” I suggest you make friends with that person, and if he/she thinks you are worthy, they will invite you to become a member.  The American Buffalo Club website can further explain what it means to be a member.

BuffaloClub2

Second game, and my favorite, is called, “Iced.”  We did this a lot on tour.  Take a Smirnoff Ice bottle, (the most disgusting of all malt beverages) and cleverly disguise it so that the person you are trying to “Ice,” is unexpectedly encountered by the bottle.  For example, the best one that I witnessed was while I was on Warped Tour. Peace Tea sponsored Warped, so there was an absurd amount of Peace Tea beverage cans everywhere and they are delicious.

peaceOne of the guys cut the bottom out of one of these cans, and put it over a Smirnoff Ice bottle, completely covering it.  He then offered the tea to our Tour Manager, covering the open bottom with a napkin.  When our TM accepted the offer, thinking it was simply a tea, he grabbed it, removing the hollow can, revealing the disgusting Smirnoff Ice, which was now glistening in his face.  When this happens, you have been Iced, my friend.  And you must get down on one knee, and chug the Smirnoff as so:

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This is what followed the Peace Tea offering.  Epic.  …And Kyle MacDougall is hot.

It seriously sucks when it happens to you, but is seriously hilarious when it happens to someone else.  I put a bottle in one of the musician’s suitcase, because I knew he was about to go through it.  He lifted up a folded shirt, and instead of finding the clean boxers he was in search of, he was presented with a Smirnoff Ice.  If you fail however, and the person you are trying to ice suspects what is happening, or if your plan is unsuccessful (for instance, if my friend had not in fact gone through his suitcase) YOU must get down on one knee and chug.  A fun touring game that you can bring to the real world.  Because remember… touring life is not the real world.

Cheers!

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